Zoom Technique
COVID has introduced therapists and patients to hitherto unthought dimensions and boundaries of online therapy. I have moved forward with the flow of COVID-change whether I will, or no. Several of my colleagues, whether psychiatrists or therapists, are already muttering that the end of bricks and mortar consulting rooms may be approaching. In my practice it is the men who are most discombobulated by Zoom and concerned to resume face-to-face work. Their homes feel archetypally female territory. Men often find it more challenging to talk about abstract emotions and inner imaginative lives. Some welcomed the ritual of their journey, often from a sequestered office, to and from therapy with the promise of an interlude of intimate connection. Despite a societal antipathy to gender distinctions, I find men feel more frustrated by lockdown with the loss of independence, status and routine opportunity for outdoor activities. Those with partners may feel they are under daily scrutiny. They are now expected to multi-task. I was speaking to someone today who explained how hard he found the period of lockdown because small daily rituals, like choosing tomorrow’s clothes, had gone out of the window. Instead, he was peering, in mock-mourning, into his wardrobe at unused bespoke suits and couture shoes, not knowing what his dress code should be. As it happens, dress conduct during lockdown has become a much-discussed topic both on social media and in therapy, along with the lethargy or anxieties that many people feel about maintaining their appearance. In a personal communication with the consultant psychiatrist Dr James Arkell about advice to avoid becoming depressed during lockdown, he offered the following:
Make sure you punctuate your day with something that anchors you to the outdoor environment and connects you to someone else – a daily shared errand at an agreed time. This is especially important for those working from home to prevent the daily grind bleeding into the evening. In a household make an event out of the everyday – dress up for dinner once a week.